Bad Movie: Pegasus vs Chimera

On October 26, I watched Pegasus vs Chimera, a movie I found on DVD for $3. I live-commented my pain on Facebook, and I've transcribed that below the fold...

• Soaring Turkey Vulture... --October 26 at 9:49pm
• A man and a younger man hunt through a marsh... probably only one will live. --October 26 at 9:49pm
• Looks like proper "Mythical Greek" time period. --October 26 at 9:50pm
• What is this crocodiloid thing they are after? --October 26 at 9:50pm
• So it is father and son... --October 26 at 9:51pm
• Dad nailed it just in time. --October 26 at 9:51pm
• Apparently monstrous crocodilians are bad hunting... not edible... --October 26 at 9:51pm
• And they are being accosted by Imperial soldiers for poaching or something. --October 26 at 9:52pm
• Son runs while Dad fights them off... --October 26 at 9:52pm
• Naturally Dad was speared in the back while giving better than he got against the enemy leader... but they let the son get away.  --October 26 at 9:53pm
• Apparently our villain is "Lord Orthos", the boss of these soldiers.  --October 26 at 9:53pm ·
• Son has vowed vengeance! --October 26 at 9:53pm
• Many years pass... --October 26 at 9:54pm
• Orthos has been busy conquering "kingdoms" and declaring himself "emperor". --October 26 at 9:55pm
• So Orthos has a "Greek King" in his dungeon. --October 26 at 9:56pm
• My mistake... sent to his execution. --October 26 at 9:56pm
• Who's the cute young woman? --October 26 at 9:57pm
• Well, the execution happened.  --October 26 at 9:57pm
• Sad music. --October 26 at 9:57pm
• Seems like he might have been her father. And he taught her to throw knives (flashback). --October 26 at 9:58pm ·
• Not thinking that Greek "kings" really taught their daughters to be killers. --October 26 at 9:59pm
• Village life with people who don't look very Greek. --October 26 at 9:59pm
• That is a totally British accent. --October 26 at 10:00pm
• The daughter has come to this master and apprentice blacksmith shop to buy knives, a bow, arrows, and a short sword... --October 26 at 10:00pm
• Apparently our English-accented blacksmith is the son from before. Dual vengeance! --October 26 at 10:01pm
• "Queen Karia?" Is that the daughter's name? --October 26 at 10:03pm
• Orthos gets spells from his evil lieutenant/warlock to keep him from growing old, it seems. --October 26 at 10:04pm
• Why is it that anyone who drinks a blood-magic potion dribbles it all over the place?  --October 26 at 10:04pm
• Orthos wants a better solution than "soldiers" to find and kill the rebels.  --October 26 at 10:05pm
• Son leaves the blacksmith shop to his apprentice to follow Karia. --October 26 at 10:05pm
• Who are these losers? Oh... Stamos, the king's treacherous general and some of Orthos's soldiers. --October 26 at 10:06pm
• And daughter killed Stamos. --October 26 at 10:07pm
• And she got her father's sword off his corpse. --October 26 at 10:07pm
• Well, she's going to have to fight some enemy soldiers (who stupidly wear no armor... Greek hoplites were effective because of their heavy bronze armor). --October 26 at 10:08pm ·
• Evil lieutenant/warlock seems to be summoning something... I'm guessing it's a chimera. --October 26 at 10:08pm
• Yep... Orthos now has a chimera hit-beast at his command.  --October 26 at 10:10pm
• And it seems to be slaughtering the rebel camp that Karia and Son were heading toward. --October 26 at 10:11pm
• At least they acknowledge that King Dorian (yay, name) teaching Karia to fight was unusual. --October 26 at 10:12pm
• But apparently she's Philony, not Kariah. I suppose the queen is still out there somewhere.  --October 26 at 10:12pm
• Found the slaughtered camp. --October 26 at 10:12pm
• Orthos and his warlock seem to be having some issues... --October 26 at 10:14pm
• Son is so humble... --October 26 at 10:14pm
• Philony thinks her mother was in the camp, but no sign of her body. Apparently some of the rebels escaped. --October 26 at 10:15pm
• Son appears to have some tracking skills. --October 26 at 10:15pm
• And they found the survivors. --October 26 at 10:16pm
• Son is "Balros"? --October 26 at 10:16pm
• Karia is seeking the "Witch Mada" for some reason. Balros thinks that's a bad idea. --October 26 at 10:17pm ·
• According to Karia, Mada has a beef with Orthos, so she should be friendly.  --October 26 at 10:18pm
• Belaros, to be more specific. --October 26 at 10:19pm
• Lieutenant/Warlock is apparently named "Actae". --October 26 at 10:19pm
• And I'm totally guessing at spellings here, so take them with a tablespoon of salt. --October 26 at 10:20pm
• Mada has accurate visions, and she thinks that Actae is playing with power beyond his control. --October 26 at 10:20pm
• Mada plans to summon a Pegasus to counter the Chimera. This is properly the myth of Bellerphon and the Pegasus, but there are some name issues. And huge plot issues.  --October 26 at 10:22pm
• Apparently Mada and Actae cannot directly attack each other with magic. Both have used up all of their power to summon these magical creatures.  --October 26 at 10:24pm ·
• Apparently the Pegasus must be returned safely to the heavens within one moon or disaster will ensue.  --October 26 at 10:26pm
• Plan A seems to be to use the Pegasus to fly to Orthos's palace and assassinate him, then deal with the Chimera.  --October 26 at 10:27pm
• Touching parting between Karia and Philony.  --October 26 at 10:28pm
• Happened to fly over the chimera attacking some farmers. Farmers didn't make it. This rescue seems to be a total CF.  --October 26 at 10:30pm
• Yeah, they lost two farmers, got injured, and ran for their lives. --October 26 at 10:31pm
• Actae spotted them fleeing with the Pegasus. --October 26 at 10:31pm
• Apparently the Pegasus can heal the injuries of its riders. --October 26 at 10:31pm
• Chimera found Mada's cave and is murdering guards. Mada and Karia are fleeing. --October 26 at 10:33pm ·
• Orthos wants to drink the blood of the Pegasus to become immortal.  --October 26 at 10:35pm
• Belaros makes an inspiring speech to Philony.  --October 26 at 10:36pm
• Belaros flew back to his shop, but it seems his apprentice "Telos" was taken prisoner. --October 26 at 10:38pm
• Mada is making a stand to give Kariah time to escape. 26 at 10:38pm
• And the Chimera did for Mada. Meanwhile, Kariah ran into Actae and got captured. --October 26 at 10:40pm
• Belaros and Philony caught up in time to save Telos, but the soldiers have orders to capture the Pegasus. 26 at 10:41pm
• Belaros is giving better than he gets in close combat, at least. --October 26 at 10:41pm
• The swordfighting choreography is pretty lame. --October 26 at 10:42pm
• Telos is saved... so I suspect he will turn traitor. The Pegasus has to get captured at some point. --October 26 at 10:42pm
• Telos is going back to the forge to make a weapon to kill the Chimera... Belaros and Philony are still going to try to do for Orthos. --October 26 at 10:43pm
• Kariah is nicely defiant. Sent to the dungeons. --October 26 at 10:45pm
• "Not far. Twenty leagues." That is VERY far in classical mythology travel time. 60 miles is about 5 days travel for people who are mostly moving on foot.  --October 26 at 10:47pm ·
• Is the Pegasus's bridle on or off? It seems to change randomly. (The bridle appears to be important.) --October 26 at 10:48pm ·
• I'm guessing that Belaros will get to kill Actae (who personally killed his father) while Philony will end Orthos. --October 26 at 10:50pm
• This brief separation looks bad.  --October 26 at 10:50pm
• Yeah... ambush. Belaros shot, Pegasus caught... Philony wakes up after the action. --October 26 at 10:51pm
• Philony apparently escaped off screen. --October 26 at 10:52pm
• Actae is getting uppity with Orthos. He wants his own kingdom.  --October 26 at 10:53pm
• Telos was also caught, and he's thrown in with Belaros. But he apparently finished the weapon. 26 at 10:53pm
• And he smuggled in an arrowhead to cut through ropes. --October 26 at 10:54pm
• Just before dying. --October 26 at 10:54pm
• And Actae has just betrayed Orthos. Orthos doesn't have to be alive for his blood to command the Chimera. --October 26 at 10:56pm
• Apparently Belaros was going all the way back to the blacksmith shop to get weapons, found Philony. They are now off to rescue the Pegasus. --October 26 at 10:56pm
• Actae was about to execute Orthos, but Orthos is a little more badass than he planned for, and he freed himself. Villain confrontation time! --October 26 at 10:57pm
• And the Chimera showed up in time to back up Orthos. --October 26 at 10:58pm
• Orthos is trying to make off with the Pegasus while the Chimera mops up Actae and his traitors. --October 26 at 10:58pm
• Belaros and Philony found the aftermath and they follow the Pegasus tracks. --October 26 at 10:59pm
• Oh, Actae. Belaros vs Actae duel time. --October 26 at 11:00pm
• Bye, bye, Actae. --October 26 at 11:01pm
• So now Philony should kill Orthos while Belaros kills the Chimera with the Pegasus's help.  --October 26 at 11:02pm
• Orthos got *some* of the Pegasus's blood, and he's feeling awfully good. --October 26 at 11:02pm
• Philony in a swordfight with Orthos... she admitted it wasn't her best weapon.  --October 26 at 11:03pm
• Belaros at least hurt the Chimera... --October 26 at 11:03pm
• They got away with the Pegasus, and they are back at the forge.  --October 26 at 11:04pm
• These weapons do not resemble what Bellerphon actually used to defeat the Chimera (a lump of lead on a stick... the Chimera's fiery breath melted it, and the lead dripped down its throat and poisoned it, but this one doesn't breathe fire). --October 26 at 11:08pm ·
• Time crunch! --October 26 at 11:06pm
• Oh, poor Telos. Caught unaware by the Chimera. --October 26 at 11:06pm
• What are they burying? Not clear. Something they think is powerful.  --October 26 at 11:07pm
• I'm thinking, don't try to kill Orthos, just cut his limbs off. --October 26 at 11:10pm
• But here comes the Chimera. --October 26 at 11:10pm
• Things are looking bleak. --October 26 at 11:11pm
• Pegasus got hurt by the Chimera saving Philony. --October 26 at 11:11pm
• Othos and Belaros are trading wounds. --October 26 at 11:11pm
• Pegasus and Chimera are facing off. --October 26 at 11:12pm
• So much tension. --October 26 at 11:12pm
• Ooh... Belaros pushed Orthos into reach of the Pegasus hooves. Stomped good. --October 26 at 11:13pm
• Chimera apparently fled. They are using Pegasus blood gathered from Orthos's corpse to make anti-Chimera weapons.  --October 26 at 11:14pm
• Hunting down the Chimera to make an end. --October 26 at 11:14pm
• It doesn't like getting hit with arrows touched by the blood. --October 26 at 11:15pm
• Philony got hurt, but Pegasus healed her. --October 26 at 11:15pm
• Philony shot it in the mouth with a "poisoned" arrow to finish it. --October 26 at 11:16pm
• Not the best planned of fight scenes.  --October 26 at 11:16pm
• So if the Pegasus dies, it's the end of the world; but if the Chimera (also a divine creature) dies... no big deal. --October 26 at 11:17pm ·
• The End. --October 26 at 11:18pm